It will always stick with me. My professor brought this to my attention a couple of years ago. She drew a mirror on the blackboard and made faded images with the chalk. Then she asked, “What are the smudges on your mirror?” I realized that my inner thoughts about myself didn’t come from me being insecure, but from other people’s perception of me. I also became conscious that no matter how much someone complimented me if someone said that ONE bad thing it stuck with me FOREVER. Then I thought…wait my stomach isn’t flat enough. I want the back of my legs to me smoother. My face is too fat and full. I need cheekbones more cheekbones. My teeth will need to be super straight and pearly white. They say that you are your own worst critic, but did I create these thoughts? I had the guy come to be a say, “You are beautiful, but you already know that.” I must have replied nonchalantly. I know I am beautiful but he portrayed me to be this magnificent creature. I thought to myself, yeah sure.
But, what happens when someone you trust and love deeply says negative things that make you re-evaluate yourself. When you honestly value someone’s opinion and they say the most hurtful thing... it’s no longer a smudge…it becomes a SCAR. If I love you and you love me then I can you not be speak the truth?
“Once you’ve let yourself fall in love with someone, once you put him on a high pedestal and he lets you down, you never want to experience that pain again”. (A quote from Jay-Z when discuss the issues with his father).
My thoughts wondered like crazy. This could relate to any relationship. Do we run from pain or do we stay in it and try to change? Ask yourself that question. What if someone wanted you to change? What if someone wanted something that you could never be? Wouldn’t that be the same as telling you to change your eye color? You know that’s impossible. Or would you fake it and go buy contacts? Do you stay and try to fix things? Or do you walk away because you know that you cannot be what he/she wants? Think about it. I may be getting too deep for you. Do you let a temporary high dictate your life?
I define “temporary high” as a person that makes you feel good when you are in their presence. It’s temporary because you cannot have this person when you want and/or need him or her. This person knows this. He/she knows that they control your inner thoughts. You are so addicted to this high that you don’t recognize the affects he/she has on your life, body and mind.
So I went from smudges on your mirror, hurtfulness, changing yourself to temporary high. I know my mind wonders. If you have no clue, basically I am saying you never can be everything to one person. You cannot please everyone. Take a look in the mirror. Be honest of what you see. I hope you see flaws. I hope you see potential and inspiration. Find you. Love you in the way the no one else could. Also, invest in a bottle of glass cleaner. Wipe those smudges away.
Love is Love LNP
“Once you’ve let yourself fall in love with someone, once you put him on a high pedestal and he lets you down, you never want to experience that pain again”. (A quote from Jay-Z when discuss the issues with his father).
My thoughts wondered like crazy. This could relate to any relationship. Do we run from pain or do we stay in it and try to change? Ask yourself that question. What if someone wanted you to change? What if someone wanted something that you could never be? Wouldn’t that be the same as telling you to change your eye color? You know that’s impossible. Or would you fake it and go buy contacts? Do you stay and try to fix things? Or do you walk away because you know that you cannot be what he/she wants? Think about it. I may be getting too deep for you. Do you let a temporary high dictate your life?
I define “temporary high” as a person that makes you feel good when you are in their presence. It’s temporary because you cannot have this person when you want and/or need him or her. This person knows this. He/she knows that they control your inner thoughts. You are so addicted to this high that you don’t recognize the affects he/she has on your life, body and mind.
So I went from smudges on your mirror, hurtfulness, changing yourself to temporary high. I know my mind wonders. If you have no clue, basically I am saying you never can be everything to one person. You cannot please everyone. Take a look in the mirror. Be honest of what you see. I hope you see flaws. I hope you see potential and inspiration. Find you. Love you in the way the no one else could. Also, invest in a bottle of glass cleaner. Wipe those smudges away.
Love is Love LNP
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